How is your personal walk with God? Are you trusting Him with the small, day-to-day decisions? Are you living in continual dependence on Him? Are you in the place where He can get your attention? You must ask yourself these crucial questions.
Why do I need God’s help in choosing a mate?
The concept of marriage originated solely from God. Mankind had absolutely nothing to do with the institution of marriage; except for being a recipient of its manifold blessings. It was God Who decided that it was not good for man to be alone and made a helpmeet for him. After that, He (God) presided over the first ever wedding ceremony recorded in history. This is why God’s help is highly needed
You need God’s help to prepare you for marriage and to help select the person who will be best for you. He will enable you to select someone who will help you fulfil God’s plan and purpose for your life. As Christians, we have to learn over and again that we must wait on the Lord; the One Who provides all we need. All you need to do is come to God in prayer with an open spirit. Be confident that God loves you, and knows your end from the beginning and wants the best for you.
What does the story of Isaac and Rebekah tell us about trusting God?
Abraham and his servant Eliezer (rather than Isaac and Rebekah) give us the example to follow (Genesis 15:2-6, 24:2-4). In verse 7, Abraham expressed his trust in God’s ability to lead Eliezer to the right woman for his son. Abraham said: The Lord . . . will send His angel before you, and you shall take a wife for my son from there. This statement of faith was not wishful thinking. Rather, those words grew out of a long-term close relationship that Abraham had with the Lord. He could look back and see how the Lord had met every need and led him in the past. He knew that the Lord could be trusted to guide him in this crucial choice for his son, Isaac.
Abraham was a living, breathing example of the truth of Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. As Abraham lived by faith, the Lord blessed him and guided his life. His servant Eliezer displayed the same kind of faith when he prayed: O Lord God of my master Abraham, please give me success this day, and show kindness to my master Abraham (Genesis 24:12).
As a single person, you can have the same confidence and quiet assurance that your life is under God’s control. As long as you walk humbly, submissively and obediently, you need not worry that you will somehow miss God’s direction about which way to turn. Just as Abraham humbled himself before the King of the universe, so should you seek God’s Kingdom first and He will take care of all your needs (Matthew 6:33) which include helping you to find a spouse or to live for Him as a single person.
Some single persons express the fear that God may give them someone they do not want, when they commit everything unreservedly into His hands. So, they do not pray at all about it. This means, they do not trust God enough to give them the best. God’s Word says: If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him? (Matthew 7:11). No earthly parent will want to give a harmful thing to his child, and God is more loving than earthly parents. Be sure therefore, that God will give you a partner after His own heart.
How should I pray for God to lead me to the right partner?
You have to pray often! God is intimately interested in hearing your requests concerning this matter. As you bring your requests before Him and submit yourself to His direction, you can be sure that He will give you nothing but what He wants for you (Psalm 37:4-5; Matthew 7:7-12).
When the servant of Abraham spoke to Rebekah about his purpose for being in Nahor, he said: As for me, being on the way, the Lord led me to the house of my master’s brethren (Genesis 24:27). Eliezer had followed instructions and was in the place, where God could give further direction. We too must be “on the way,” walking in obedience to God, if we expect Him to lead us.
How does the Holy Spirit guide my choices, thinking & feelings?
Even though the New Testament contains several examples of how the Holy Spirit can lead through inner impressions (Acts 8:29; 11:28; 13:2; 21:11; 1 Corinthians 14:30), separating our subjective feelings or urges from the voice of the Spirit is not always an easy thing to do. However, we can be sure that the Spirit would never violate the clear commands of the Bible. The Spirit would never tell us to choose to marry an unbeliever. He would not lead us to marry for money or guide us to marry in conflict with the principles of the Word of God.
Are you in the place where God can lead you? For instance, you can’t expect Him to direct you to a Christian mate, if you are hanging around people who don’t have good reputations, or engaged in premarital sex. God won’t direct you if you are neglecting times of personal prayer and worship, or harbouring sinful attitudes. You can’t expect God’s help in choosing a mate, if you are living in disobedience to His will. This is why it becomes very important that you surrender your life to Christ and become born again.